Sleep tight little man-cub, rest in peace.

This week I had a momentary moment of madness.

I imagined that I would like to have a pet snake.

I would wear him around my neck like a scarf. I would snuggle him at night. He would fetch things for me. He would interpretive dance with me. He would be incredibly clever. I would call him King Vipera.

We would be two peas in a pod. Sharing an uncommon animal-person bond. We would have the best fun, King Vipera and I.

I had all of these imaginations while watching "The Princess and the Frog". Mama Odie and her darling serpent seemed to be having an absolutely smashing time.

Then it occurred to me that my forays with a snake might turn out somewhat differently, perhaps snakes in real life are not as hilarious as snakes in Disney movies. Also I remembered that I am somewhat frightened of snakes. And we all remember how close Mowgli came to resting in peace while resting amongst Kaa's coils.

Speaking of Mowgli, I drew a stunning likeness of him a couple weeks ago.

Everyone pretended that they had no idea that it was him, but I knew that they knew and that they were just pretending that they didn't know because they were painfully jealous of my artful skills.

Anyway. I decided that I should probably just get a cat.

She don't care what her momma says, no, she's gonna have my baby.

Sometimes I get rather bored and do things like take pictures of myself pretending to be pregnant. Well, technically I didn't take these. Meagan did. So this is probably only humorous to us. And just weird to everyone else.


Rest assured, I am not pregnant. Nor do I ever plan to be.

Oddly, I have been having dreams about babies. Not me having babies, but finding babies and then having to take care of them. Babies and llamas. I am still searching for the meaning.

He doesn't get you're human like I do.

This is possibly the most humorous thing I have ever seen. I mean come on, "But he sparkles, and I'm so hairy"? Classic. And I don't even really like Twilight. Or Taylor Swift. Speaking of which, this is so fitting considering that Taylor Lautner is dating Taylor Swift. No one knows celebrity gossip like I do.

I've got nothing to do today but smile.

Last night I got a telephone call from my puppy dog, Clive. Somehow Meagan's phone was in the backyard and he picked it up. And called me. We got bonds, baby, just try to break them.

Bedazzled with rhinestones!

So I went to Lagoon last week with Amy, Judson, Matty, Traci, and Robbie. Thank you Amy! I think we had a lovely day for the most part. It was quite hot, but still enjoyable.

Apparently Traci's favorite "ride" is the ski lift. I mean, is that even a ride?

Oh, and I got to feel Matty's lump again. We discussed the possiblity of a scar. I'm a bit jealous, actually.

Judson was very serious about the whole ride riding thing. And Amy was just a barrel of monkeys. Delightful.

Traci had some difficulties. Suing was threatened.

Traci loves to climb. She and Gideon should be besties.

We also went shopping at the gateway mall. And by "shopping" and "we" I mean that Traci went shopping while Robbie and I sat on various couches and chairs.

Also, I had a bizarre dream. Not this is unusual or anything, I am always have strange dreams. In my dream I had forgotten something in Utah so Robbie drove me back to pick it up. Somehow we ended up staying at Amy's house for family home evening. We decorated cats. Live ones. With rhinestones. The rhinestones were supposed to depict the mood of the cat. Whatever that means. Anyway, my cat was particularly vicious. He kept clawing at me and trying to bite me every time I stuck him with a rhinestone. I just couldn't understand why. It was all sorts of upsetting. Then Robbie drove me home and Matty came along for the ride. As we crossed the state line into Idaho Matty said "I miss Utah". This was even more upsetting than the cat. So I told him that Idaho was the best and that he should be more loyal to the land of his birth (which is ironic considering that I was born in Utah), which is when he told me that he hated Idaho and everything in it and that he couldn't wait to leave. Naturally I cried. And Robbie patted my back and told Matty to shut up. I really don't love Idaho that much. Not enough to cry and have to be consoled by Robb. Not that he would have actually comforted me in real life, he doesn't give sympathy, only pity.

It's boots and chaps, it's cowboy hats.

So I went to a rodeo last week. My first ever. It was pretty great. Actually, it was more than great, it made my life. Rodeos are the best fun. I now appreciate the significance of eight seconds. I just wanted to take the little cowboys home with me. They were completely adorable in their miniature boots, wranglers, plaid shirts, and cowboy hats. The regular cowboys were lovely, as well. Oh, and we dressed up. Like I wore my plaid shirt and everything. And I didn't wear a skirt.

Sometimes I am not the finest photographer. And sometimes I forget to take pictures. So while it appears that only Robbie and I went rodeo-ing really there was a whole group of rodeo enthusiasts.

The one rodeo down-side was the complete lack of pigs. I love pigs. So we went to the petting zoo to look at the precious pot-belly babies. I think I want one. I also want some boots. And I want to watch "Eight seconds".

All we need is sleep.

A few things.
First, a little story. It turns out that I really am completely insane, not just mostly. Last week the singles ward had a camp-out. Traci, Robbie, and I went up for the evening festivities, having no intention of staying the night but feeling the need to make an appearance. The three of us went on a nature walk, which was lovely, up until the end. We came upon a ground squirrel, a terribly ill ground squirrel. And I could not bring myself to leave it, even though I know that everything dies alone. So Robbie and Traci went to find Tanner because he is nature-y and seems like the sort who would know what to do in such a dire situation. I was given instructions not to touch "it" and stayed to cry over the creature's little broken body. Alas and Alack, no Tanner was found but instead his older brother, Nick (who is equally skilled in the ways of nature and such), was recruited to assess and deal with the situation. Melissa also tagged along with the purpose of comforting me, as I had completely lost it. So Nick came and told me that we could put it out of it's misery or we could leave it to freeze or be eaten. I chose the former. So I walked away and he took care of it. I thanked him later and he thought I was being sarcastic so Traci had explain that I really was serious, I was grateful that he could do the thing that I could not. I really wasn't upset about it dying, I understand the way the world works, that death cannot be stopped, I was just crushed that the little guy was in so much pain. I could hear it wheezing. Anyway. Everyone knows now. Insanity is killing me.

The only pictures that I have from girl's camp are of me hugging the Nephi cut-out. I don't know.

I have been writing on my skin and buying fake tattoos a lot as of late. A lot. This tiger tattoo stayed for a long time. Removing it was a struggle. I still loved it, though. It had sparkles. And I love flashing tattoos at people and seeing their shocked faces. Although, the shock is very possibly over my signature spot and not the tattoo itself.

Robbie told me once that he cannot fall asleep anywhere but at his own house. It warms my little heart that our newly adopted brother feels at home enough to nap. The rest of the family is quite pleased as well. In other sleeping news, I am exhausted and I keep waking at the unearthly hour of seven.